I Am the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: An Interview.

The Austrian Oak is best known as an action movie legend. But, in the midst of his blockbuster fame in the 1980s and 1990s, he also starred in several genuinely hilarious comedies. The standout film is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35th anniversary this winter.

The Film and The Famous Scene

In the hit comedy, Schwarzenegger portrays a tough police officer who masquerades as a schoolteacher to locate a fugitive. During the movie, the crime storyline acts as a basic structure for Arnold to have charming scenes with children. The most unforgettable belongs to a child named Joseph, who unprompted stands up and states the stoic star, “Males have a penis, females have a vagina.” Schwarzenegger replies icily, “Thanks for the tip.”

That iconic child was played by child star Miko Hughes. Beyond this role included a recurring role on Full House playing the antagonist to the Olsen twins and the pivotal role of the resurrected boy in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with several projects listed on his IMDb. He also engages with fans at the con circuit. Not long ago shared his experiences from the filming of the classic after all this time.

Behind the Scenes

Question: Starting off, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the youngest of all the kids on set.

Wow, I can't remember being four. Do you have any memories from that time?

Yeah, somewhat. They're brief images. They're like mental photographs.

Do you recall how you got the part in Kindergarten Cop?

My family, especially my mother would bring me to auditions. Often it was like a cattle call. There'd be dozens of children and we'd all patiently queue, enter the casting office, be in there less than five minutes, do whatever little line they wanted and then leave. My parents would help me learn the words and then, as soon as I could read, that was the initial content I was reading.

Do you have an impression of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?

He was extremely gentle. He was playful. He was nice, which I suppose isn't too surprising. It would be strange if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a productive set. He was fun to be around.

“It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”

I knew he was a major movie star because that's what my parents told me, but I had never really seen his movies. I felt the importance — it was exciting — but he wasn't scary to me. He was just fun and I only wanted to hang out with him when he had time. He was occupied, of course, but he'd kind of play with us here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd tense up and we'd be dangling there. He was really, really generous. He purchased for each child in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was the hottest tech. That was the coolest device, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It wore out in time. I also have a authentic coach's whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your experience as being enjoyable?

You know, it's funny, that movie is such a landmark. It was a huge film, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of the star himself, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, traveling to Oregon, the production design, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. Like, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was new. That was the coolest toy, and I was proficient. I was the smallest kid and some of the older kids would hand me their devices to get past hard parts on games because I could do it, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all little kid memories.

That Famous Quote

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember the context? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I probably didn't know what the word provocative meant, but I knew it was provocative and it caused the crew to chuckle. I understood it was kind of something I shouldn't normally say, but I was given an exception in this case because it was humorous.

“She really wrestled with it.”

How it was conceived, from what I understand, was they were still developing characters. A few scenes were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it was more of a collaboration, but they refined it on set and, I suppose someone in charge came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to say this. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "Give me a moment, I'll decide tomorrow" and took a day or two. It was a tough call for her. She said she wasn't sure, but she believed it would likely become one of the most memorable lines from the movie and her instinct was correct.